JULY 23 Wet and Frustrated

I left the roadside rest stop and headed for Antigo hoping to get there before my 10 o'clock patient. The main goal for today was to find my grandmother's (on my mother's side) grave here in Antigo,Wi where she and her two siblings lived on a farm before she was married. I have fond memories of an old farmhouse where a spinster and Bachelor siblings living together and ran a small farm with chickens, cows and horses and a massive garden. Uncle George would let me ride the old nag bareback and milk a cow and then shoot some directly into my mouth which I thought was a great treat. Hot frothy milk just like espresso minus the coffee.

Well I realized I have no idea where my grandmother was buried so the Sherlock Holmes in me took over . Google said there were several cemeteries in town two of which were permanently closed so that didn't help but I called my niece (or something twice removed) in Milwaukee that had celebrated my birthday with me and asked her if she knew where the cemetery was. All she knew was she thought it was near the hospital. So I found the hospital and sure enough there was a cemetery right next to it. So how does one go about finding a gravesite among thousands. Finally someone told me there is a cemetery registry at the courthouse. So I went there and inquired and no. Doris Hilgendorf was not listed among any of the three functioning cemeteries that they have jurisdiction over however there was a Catholic cemetery" Queen of peace "that the catholic church has jurisdiction over. That seemed reasonable since my grandmother was a devout Catholic. So much so that I remember it almost destroyed her faith when they announced that you no longer had to fast from meat on Friday. She had strictly adhered to what she considered a basic tenant of Catholicism and could not for the life of her understand how it could simply disappear overnight. She was a dear soul and was one of those people who couldn't go to bed if there were dirty dishes in the sink. I remember her getting up at two in the morning after all the guests had left from my parents parties and go out in the kitchen and do the dishes and straighten up the house because she couldn't sleep knowing the house was in such disarray. Obviously I am not genetically related to her.

The courthouse gave me a telephone number of the people at Saint Hyacinth Church who are in charge. I called the number and of course got a voicemail that said they would call me back. I left all the information I knew about her and her family names and then went for lunch. When they didn't return my phone call I decided to go to the cemetery I just start hunting in areas that looked like older graves as she has been gone for at least 50 years. St. John's Church was right next to the cemetery so I wandered in there asking if they knew how to reach people in charge of the cemetery. He told me that the lady in that office only works a couple hours per week but he would try to see if he could get her at home. Bingo ! yes ,she was home and yes she would be right over to the parish office and meet me there. About that time the skies opened up and it looked like we would have a flash flood and I had left some of the windows open for Sheba. I found my way back to the parish office just a few blocks away but it was raining so hard I couldn't go in even though I saw her in the vestibule waiting for me. The umbrella of course was conveniently tucked under a kayak and 1000 other miscellaneous essentials. In a few minutes however it did clear enough for me to run in and get the information she already hadfor me from my voicemail description it was block #9 Lot 4 Grave number 2 Doris Hilgendorf ,her husband Paul Hilgendorf next to her and Roxy Baxter her sister next to him and an infant son that I didn't know anything about, Beatrice( my mom) and Roland her brother were the only children I knew about. So I gave her a big hug and thanked her profusely as I now had in my hot little hand ,I thought ,all I needed to find my grandmother. However when I got back to the cemetery my spatial disorientation kicked in and for the life of me I could not find anything called a block #9 a lot of posts needed repair so I thought that they were missing block signs until I ran into a lady who said oh I just passed a block six and seven over on the other side I bet it's over there. So off I went and sure enough I found block nine .After walking around a bit still slightly raining I realized that it was block nine of Antigo cemetery not Prince of peace cemetery which were adjacent to each other. So after re-studying the block diagram I decided to come in a different entrance and see if that would make more sense and sure enough I found a six and a seven and finally the jackpot block #9. OK .so then how do you decide what really constitutes a block and where is lot four in block nine? No markings whatsoever to give a clue. So I set out with my umbrella leaving Sheba to tremble on her own in the car as it was thundering and lightning. I combed the whole area that could possibly be block nine and then went back and even scraped some of the graves Laying flat although I presume there was a head stone and as I think about it I am sure my father would've seen to it that she was properly remembered as she and he had a very special loving relationship. Well it was getting dark and I was soaking wet and I had no idea what else I could do. There must be some error in the information that I was given. I have come so far and gotten so close that I resolved to park in front of the parish hall and bug them again at eight in the morning before my 9 o'clock patient. The rain has stopped and it's time for bed.